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I repair Lava Lamps for a living. posted on 05/14/04 by Opie

Ok since that Nick Berg video was such a big comment fest, we should just sit back for a moment and laugh. (Scroll down for the video)

First, Here are some super-cool pictures (some un-edited) of some of the stuff our cool soldiers did to them: (Some are fake, but who cares?)

View the page here stupid.

Second, Steal Underpants.. Oops. - Here's an offensive page of that Video. (Kind of)

View the page here stupid.

Third, (I stole this idea from a b0g commenter)

Check me out. If you get offended easily, don't click this one.

Turn your speakers up ^



Different than the other. Still naughty.

Note: I'm not trying to degrade this man's life. We really need to put the facts up and realize that there is a war going on and there's nothing we can do about it. Get over it and laugh.

AND HERE'S SOME MORE SHIT TO MAKE YOU PEE YOUR PANTS! [/caps key]



I bet some of you try this out.



The best part of Predator, only different.



She's faking it. haha (NOT SAFE FOR WORK)



I like this commercial.

Q and A Fun:

Q: What's the difference between Jesus and a picture of Jesus?
A: It only takes one nail to hang a picture of Jesus.

Q: What would it take to reunite the Beatles?
A: Two more bullets.

Q: How do we know that Noah wasn't black?
A: He only took 2 chickens.

Q: How do Chinese parents name there kids?
A: They throw pots and pans against the wall.

Q: How do you stop a clown from laughing?
A: Hit him in the face with an axe.

Q: Why did Hitler commit suicide?
A: He got the gas bill.

Q: What's the difference between Micheal Jackson and a Tree.
A: Trees don't have sex with little boys. (This one works with ANY OBJECT!)



This is that fake Britney Spears chick, I'd hit it. Oh check out Stile

No this isn't the end



Come back here, you little fucker!



Nick? I keed.



Someone slide her a sharp object.



Your little brother for lunch today Yi Yo Kung WANG.



Add a little green puke to this and TA DA.



Grandma looks busy.



Hmmmmm.



Hockey rules.



Penis size is a must.



Family Circus is joining the fun.



Twins 2.

- FFL -

- ARNOLD IS COMING!!
- I hate these pages too.
- People Potato Heads.
- Awful Plastic Surgery.
- Google has a blog now.
- HAHAHAHA ASIANS!!!!!!
- Check out that bear claw.
- Remember that eel video?
- Nick with his head back on.
- What the hell is this dude on?
- Ever want to be a Ghostbuster?
- Cool ASCII art (Nav on the left)
- I wanna play with a Slashbuster.
- Look, a bunch of stupid honkeys!
- The domain name speaks for itself.
- What a sicko.. Death sentence please.
- Queer Abs.. You'll laugh, unless you're gay.
- If you have hair on your back, this may help.
- That has to suck, yet everyone is cheering.
- Here's that Linsey Lohan SNL Harry Potter clip.
- I guess a necro porn site should buy this one up.
- No way, your own robot? I'll take one with a pussy.
- This scared the BE-JESUS out of me.. Well not really.
- Smackfest 2004! (Guys slapping each other, very funny.)
- Skeet Skeet Skeet Skeet Skeet Skeet and another skeet.
- Gay test. (Posted a LONG time ago) I'm 28% gay. Suicide time..
- Uh oh, I bet they start looking for hookers next. Oh wait a second...
- If they land, just throw some water or Windex of them. Video = here

116 comments (1611 views)
If you haven't seen it posted on 05/12/04 by Opie

Alright I'm sure you've heard about this US solider (or whatever) getting his head cut off. The news wont show the whole video, but I will.

>>>>>>>>> Read me stupid <<<<<<<<<<

Before you pussies start your bitching, It's graphic and stuff. Shows his head actually being cut off.



I wont make a joke, so we'll just cut to the chase.


(Right click, Save target as)

Mirror 1 = here
Mirror 2 = here

Thanks fuckers!

Edit Since this is apparently a big deal or whatever I'll just wait until Friday and post the stuff you guys sent it. So it will be a pretty big post to close off the week.

I'm not going to type what I think of all this, mainly because I don't want to read the bitching. I'll just say that it's going to get worst, so stop crying. (Then Canada will take over the world.. eh?)

CONTINUE WITH THE DEBATING!!! Then wash up.

2400 comments (102330 views)
I funny posted on 05/11/04 by Opie

What do you call 3 mexicans, a Chinese guy, and 3 black men standing in a row on a lawn?

A water sprinkler, spick spick spick chink nigga nigga nigga



Read the story on this here.



People having fun with an Air horn.



It's not just ice.. It's DRY ICE.



This is funny because I didn't even add the music.



Hey, the Lifetime network is looking for you bitch.



Ron is such a Pimp.



I was lookin' for that sucka.



Where are their helmets at?

- FFL - (Should keep you busy)

- Killer Cheeto.
- Syphilis is nasty.
- No more kids bitch!
- Bru stuff, The bru.
- Heads up to you kid.
- Fun with cornstarch.
- Hey they changed it.
- Olsen twins toothpaste.
- Wear shit on your ears.
- Um, crazy humping flash.
- Crack some knuckles bitch.
- Make Bush's speech for him.
- Oh no, they got me all right.
- Like Operation, but all ASIAN.
- Celebrity Secrets. Good stuff.
- Whatcha think? Fake Britney?
- Kind of funny Cigar commercial.
- PURE HATE! This makes me wet.
- Radeon X800 vs. GeForce 6800.
- Remember when jackass did this?
- I love the news headline. Idiots.
- Jesus Christ!!!!!... I've seen bigger.
- What the hell is this story all about?
- Just click the register button, it's fake.
- How far can you get on this Dot game?
- Jamie needs some make-up or something.
- HAY GURLS, Need some nipple enhancers?
- I think she's smoking pinestraw or something.
- What a fat dick, for your mother fucking mouth.
- Anyone seen this Wedding Dress Guy? I haven't.
- Ok I wont touch the jokes on this wheel basket.
- This was funny to me, Also can be used for Dildos.
- Too many people are depressed. Just kill yourselves.
- I saw this gay shit on HBO, Looks painful for the penis.
- Here's that video of that helicopter crashing in New York.
- 3D Air Strike game, I was too lazy to download it though.
- What the fuck kind of music video is this? I hope it's a joke.
- Pics of RETARDS! Check out the "Bert" look-a-like on the last row.
- Well if you need "Sex Ed" to know about sex, you're retarded anyway.
- Funny thing is that, it must have been asked enough to get added in their FAQ.
- I can't go out this weekend, I'm off to have sex with dead girls ON THE INTERNET!

74 comments (2478 views)
Hint: Gummy and are bears. posted on 05/10/04 by Opie



30 Hornets VS 30,000 Bees.

That is all. (Other stuff you guys sent over the weekend will go up tomorrow)

79 comments (7960 views)
Giggle time posted on 05/07/04 by Opie

What do you call 9 Mexicans standing in front of a house?

A spicket fence.



I think I can.. I think I can..



I wonder if he knows where he is?



"Look Momma, It's the Devil."



Funny image of the day award goes too..



Saw this in the forums, Dot Beta is silly.



If you look close you'll be able to see someone not interested.

If you don't laugh at this below, You don't belong here.

Little Billy on Getting Older

Little Billy was sitting on a park bench munching on one candy bar after another.

After the 6th one, a man on the bench across from him said, "Son, you know eating all that candy isn't good for you. It will give you acne, rot your teeth, and make you fat."

Little Billy replied, "My grandfather lived to be 107 years old."

"Oh?" replied the man. " Did your grandfather eat 6 candy bars at a time?"

"No" replied Little Billy, "he minded his own fucking business!!"

Little Billy on...Philosophy

A teacher asks her class, "If there are 5 birds sitting on a fence and you shoot one of them, how many will be left?"

She calls on little Billy.

He replies, "None, they will all fly away with the first gunshot."

The teacher replies, "The correct answer is 4, but I like your thinking."

Then little Billy says, "I have a question for YOU. There are 3 women sitting on a bench having ice cream: One is delicately licking the sides of the triple scoop of ice cream. The second is gobbling down the top and sucking the cone. The third is biting off the top of the ice cream. Which one is married?"

The teacher, blushing a great deal, replies, "Well, I suppose the one that's gobbled down the top and sucked the cone."

To which Little Billy replied, "The correct answer is 'the one with the wedding ring on,' but I like your thinking."

Little Billy on... Math

Little Billy returns home from school and says he got an F in arithmetic.

"Why?" asks the father."

"The teacher asked, 'How much is 2x3?' I said 6," replied Billy.

"But that's right!" says his dad.

"Yeah, but then she asked me, 'How much is 3x2?'"

"What's the fucking difference?" asks the father?

"That's what I said!"

Little Billy on...English

Little Billy goes to school, and the teacher says, "Today we are going to learn multi-syllable words, class. Does anybody have an example of a multi-syllable word?"

Billy says " Mas-tur-bate."

Miss Rogers smiles and says, "Wow, little Billy, that's a mouthful."

Little Billy says, "No, Miss Rogers, you're thinking of a blowjob."

Little Billy on...Grammar

One day, during lessons on proper grammar, the teacher asked for a show hands from those who could use the word "beautiful" in the same sentence twice.

First she called on little Suzie, who responded with, "My father bought my mother a beautiful dress and she looked beautiful in it."

"Very good, Suzie," replied the teacher. She then called on little Michael.

"My mommy planned a beautiful banquet and it turned out beautifully."

The teacher responded, "Excellent, Michael!"Then, she reluctantly called on little Billy.

"Last night, at the dinner table, my sister told my father that she was pregnant, and he said "Beautiful, just fucking beautiful."

- FFL -

- Like Mazes?
- The bru? Go K.
- That's a nice booty.
- Banana Phone REMIX!
- Banana Phone REMIX! x2
- Spiderman Traipse game.
- You guys like kitty porn?
- The Shining in 30 seconds.
- 80's TV Show Theme Songs.
- For some reason this is funny.
- Need help with your homework?
- Queen - It's fun to smoke Marijuana.
- Only in Kenya.. HUMAN VERSION!!..
- Hot naked girl photo shoot. (Video)
- He dug a hole in his backyard.. Crazy.
- Evilcube.. This should keep you busy for awhile.
- Duct tape.. The new fashion thingy going around.
- Britney Spears - Sleep with me I'm not too young.
- I like pushing big orange buttons. I also eat them.
- I take it this girl doesn't know anything about cars.
- How to fold clothes.. The ASIAN WAY!.. A crazy one at that.

77 comments (4493 views)
Damn it Bobby posted on 05/06/04 by Opie

What did the retarded apple say?

Meow.



Here it is!!!!




Blonde's and cars.



Let's go cook some little BABIES!



This almost made me pee my pants.



Ohhh she sucks those guys dicks off. [/Jay]



My Pastor sent me this.



What a little tubby bitch.

How many kids with A.D.D. does it take to change a lightbulb?

Want to ride a bike?

- FFL -

- Neat-o juggler.
- For gay hunters?
- Well it's about time.
- The Power is yours!
- Russian fighting clips.
- *Hands on* painting.
- The internet is SHIT!
- More of Lindsay Lohan.
- Go douche up for pussy bitch.
- Here's a sick funny site for ya.
- She looks like of crazy anyway.
- More on that bad ass Mini Van.
- What the hell are the googles?
- Castle Cat, The music is classic.
- Who doesn't belong here. (IMDB)
- Possibly the best award ever given.
- Damn, this guy got nailed really good.
- Did you see this stuff on Oprah?
- Not sure what the hell is going on here.
- How to say No to drugs. (Pretty funny)
- Arnold and Asians go quite well together.
- First flash I've seen featuring a black guy.
- How can someone this hot type like this?
- The Fucking prince of Spliss vs Mr. Niceass.
- The glass of water.. Too much time brotha.
- I really don't like this P Diddy puppy dog guy.
- Freaks + Live Journal x2 = Pippi LongStocking.
- Well, people are now drawing CRAZY ASIANS!
- These guys aren't right in the head. I like them.
- Cool highway car shooting/blowing shit up game.
- Kids beating the hell out of each other with Hulk Hands.
- If those kids think that's scary, they should turn around.
- I'm sure this guy is just joking, I still don't like him though.
- Holy shit! I so wouldn't have any use for this what-so-ever.
- If you haven't seen this bulldog skating.. Well, where have you been?
- Goths scare me, but I still want to do one. Preferably a stuffed one for safety..
- If I see those trucker hat wearing idiots with something like this, I will kill myself.
- Before you go crazy, I'll tell you this is 100% fake. It isn't possible unless she has no hips or part hippo.

Plug-a-dug: Stile, Battle Center, Datacom Enterprises, Attract Women.

53 comments (1166 views)
TopPoon: F-poonteens coming at cha! posted on 05/04/04 by Opie



Lindsay Lohan is almost 18. (17 is legal here anyway)



Some guy edited yesterday's Dailybabe image.



More of that image posted yesterday. (Funnier)

Jokes

A little boy about 10 years old was walking down the sidewalk, dragging a flattened frog on a string behind him. He came up to the doorstep of a whorehouse and knocked on the door. When the Madam answered it, she saw the little boy and asked what he wanted. He said, "I want to have sex with one of the women inside. I have the money to buy it, and I'm not leaving until I get it." The Madam figured, why not, so she told him to come in. Once in, she told him to pick any of the girls he liked. He asked, "Do any of the girls have any diseases?" Of course, the Madam said, "No!" He said, "I heard all the men talking about having to get shots after making love with Amber. THAT'S the girl I want." Since the little boy was so adamant and had the money to pay for it, the Madam told him to go to the first room on the right. He headed down the hall dragging the squashed frog behind him. Ten minutes later he came back, still dragging the frog, paid the Madam, and headed out the door! The Madam stopped him and asked, "Why did you pick the only girl in the place with a disease, instead of one of the others?" He said, "Well, if you must know, tonight when I get home, my parents are going out to a restaurant to eat, leaving me at home with a baby-sitter. After they leave, my baby-sitter will have sex with me because she just happens to be very fond of cute little boys. She will then get the disease that I just caught. When Mom and Dad get back, Dad will take the baby-sitter home. On the way, he'll jump the baby-sitter's bones, and he'll catch the disease. Then when dad gets home from the baby-sitters, he and Mom will go to bed and have sex, and Mom will catch it. In the morning when Dad goes to work, the Milkman will deliver the milk, have a quickie with Mom and catch the disease, and HE'S the son-of-a-bitch who ran over my FROG!"

---------------------------------------------------------

A young man moved into a new apartment on his own, and went to the lobby to put his name on his mailbox. While there, an attractive young lady came out of the apartment next to the mailboxes wearing a robe. The boy smiled at the young woman and she started a conversation with him. As they talked, her robe slipped open, and it was obvious that she had nothing else on. The poor kid broke into a sweat trying to maintain eye contact. After a few minutes, she placed her hand on his arm and said, "let's go to my apartment, I hear someone coming" He followed her into her apartment, she closed the door and leaned against it, allowing her robe to fall off completely. Now nude, she purred at him, "what would you say is my best feature"? Flustered and embarrassed, he finally squeaked, "It's got to be your ears" Astounded, and a little hurt she asked "my ears? Look at these breasts, they are full and 100% natural I work out every day, my butt is firm and solid,look at my skin - no blemishes anywhere.How can you think that the best part of my body is my ears? Clearing his throat, he stammered "Outside, when you said you heard someone coming? That was me."

On another note, you guys are doing a great job of submitting stuff this week. Tomorrow's post will have some extra crap.

58 comments (2390 views)
Let's go fall off the monkey bars! posted on 05/04/04 by Opie

Necrophilia: That Uncontrollable Urge To Crack Open A Cold One.

REQUEST FOR YOU GUYS

If anyone has the Janet Jackson/Brian Fellow SNL skit from a few weeks ago, e-mail it to me.

Thanks! AND here's stuff to make you pee your pants!!!!...

Screen Caps of Gena Lee Nolin sex tape:



You decide, could not even be her.

IF I GET ONE E-MAIL ABOUT THIS TAPE I WILL NOT POST IT WHEN I GET IT. (I'm still getting paris e-mails)



Bush wiping his glasses off, what a tool.



Hockey is a hell-of-a sport.



This was an actual AD.



I should host a Game Show of "Who doesn't Belong".



Honkeys.. Go figure.



Apparently that's her soda POP!



We need to video of this.



Is this R Kelly-ish?

- FFL -

- Ha, He's a dyke.
- Can I join this club?
- Back yard roller coaster.
- Go bid on Egay fruit boy.
- Animation with dicks and shit.
- These things hurt babies? Neat.
- This game should keep you busy.
- What the hell are these Asians doing?
- Oh snap! This made me bust out laughing.
- Swallow bitch, Mine taste like saltnamon.
- This shit on a dollar thing was actually funny.
- Fred Durst's blog, It really is. See this if in doubt.
- Who fucking cares? I want to see the tape though!
- Britney tanning on a roof-top!!!!! ..And thought I was a pervert.
- Asian's and Mcdonald's go well together.. I'll take a number 6 please.
- HEY! I told that silly bitch not to post my pic online. *Snapping in a Z*
- And to think I used to masturbate to her back in the "Look Who's talking" days.

44 comments (943 views)
WE GOT FUNYUNS! posted on 05/03/04 by Opie

What is positive about Africa?

HIV.



SLAM DANCING!



Russian Jerry Springer

From the submitter:

"this is a skeleton belived to be over a million years old....back from the add...people use to be real big back then...same ppl who built the pyrameds...thx"



I think someone took to many stupid pills today.

MO' SHIT



Camera phones are hot today.



Removed, well kind of.



This is a punk band.. Take a guess genius.



Someone sent me this lovely Sprint phone pic.



The guy in the back sums it up.



Awww look, it's twins.

A police officer follows a car for one hour and the driver seems to be driving so good that the officer decides to award the driver.

The cop pulls the car over and says "You just won 100 dollars, he said. "I'm just curious, but what will you do with the money?"

The man says "Probably use it to get my drivers license"

The second guy in the car says "Don't listen to him, he's not him self when he is drunk."

Then a guy in the back seat goes, "I told you not to steal this car."

The 4th guy in the car says, "Just don't tell him the gun is in the glove compartment."

Then a voice from the trunk goes "Are we in mexico yet?"

- FFL -

- Vanhelsing.com
- Bottle rocket fun.
- Lil' Jon soundboard.
- Banana phone rules.
- Shake that ass bitch!
- Haha.. Check this out.
- Jezz, what a dumbass.
- "Why do people fight" guy?
- CSpan prank call.. "CUNT NIGGER!"
- Aicha MP3.. Perhaps the real version?
- 69 sexual positions. (Images be here)
- Hillary Duff is Hitler's long lost daughter!
- Hey look, whores for our troops. Gid-e-up!
- Sex stories from India, long reads and stuff.
- Oops yet another that fell off the short bus.
- People making fun of The Passion.. Good stuff.
- What the fuck? There's even a members section.
- Someone hacked this school site.. Naughty naughty..
- Uh Oh.. here's another! Do your stuff young grasshoppers.
- The person that sent this said it's apparently the real Goatse guy.
- Pac-Manhattan.. These guys are retards, but I want to see it live.
- Britney WITHOUT MAKE-UP AND STUFF.. OH MY GOD!!!!!! (Sarcasm police)

60 comments (1723 views)
I'm bored.. Time to give myself a stranger posted on 05/01/04 by Opie

What did the Mexican man say when the house fell on him?

Get off me homes.

Iraq Prisoner Abuse



More over here



Dirty PANTIES!!!!!



BoneZZZZ.



A wee bit too much to drink.



Bad-ass Firefighter.



Don't want to go to war?

- FFL -

- Pingu PART 4!
- Don't steal meat in Cali.
- John Claude does rule a lot.
- This site is pathetic.. Losers..
- This must be for stupid people.
- Linkin Park pulling a Nickelback?
- Pretty cool Quad racing game.
- Haha.. What did he say again?
- Get married on THE INTERNET!
- Rockfish.. Very good graphics.
- Graphic Iraq war photos.. WEEE.
- Anyone have the actual prank call?
- Goatse or something? (GraphICCCC)
- Um, move your mouse up and down.
- I wanted to see some flying ASIANS!
- If he was Asian I would understand.. Hmmm.
- Change the way we see the world? Alrighty.
- I wonder if they have a salty favor? Oh nevermind.
- Is this the same Aiesha that dork was singing about?
- If you can't see this scam a coming, You need to jump off a roof.

Oh yeah, don't get used to weekend post. Only doing it because of the new month etc..

70 comments (3874 views)

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