posted on 08/12/09 by Opie
W.O.W (More Hanna)
A couple of 5 second movies.
Monkeys like an audience.
He almost died.
Finish Him! (her)
Sesame Street Death Metal!
A young guy from Nebraska moves to Florida and goes to a big "everything under one roof" department store looking for a job. The Manager says, "Do you have any sales experience?" The kid says, "Yeah. I was a salesman back in Omaha."
Well, the boss liked the kid and gave him the job. "You start tomorrow." I'll come down after we close and see how you did."
His first day on the job was rough, but he got through it. After the store was locked up, the boss came down. "How many customers bought something from you today? The kid says, "One".
The boss says, "Just one? Our sales people average 20 to 30 customers a day. How much was the sale for?"
The kid says, "$101,237.65 ".
The boss says, "$101,237.65? What the heck did you sell?"
The kid says, "First, I sold him a small fish hook. Then I sold him a medium fishhook. Then I sold him a larger fishhook. Then I sold him a new fishing rod. Then I asked him where he was going fishing and he said down the coast, so I told him he was going to need a boat, so we went down to the boat department and I sold him a twin engine Boston Whaler. Then he said he didn't think his Honda Civic would pull it, so I took him down to the automotive department and sold him that 4x4 Expedition."
The boss said, "A guy came in here to buy a fish hook and you sold him a BOAT and a TRUCK?"
The kid said, "No, the guy came in here to buy Tampons for his wife, and I said, 'Dude, your weekend's shot, you should go fishing.'"
- FFL -
[ SFW ] - Cheap shirts.
[NSFW] - Amateur teens.
[ SFW ] - I'M ON A SHIP!
[NSFW] - I love strippers.
[NSFW] - Naked cam girls.
[ SFW ] - Milk prank. Haha
[ SFW ] - Dirty Talk Basics.
[NSFW] - Perfect KO punch.
[NSFW] - MYSPACE OF SEX!
[ SFW ] - What the fuck is this?
[ SFW ] - Girl hit by drunk driver.
[NSFW] - She gets pounded hard.
[ SFW ] - How not to use a forklift.
[NSFW] - Goddamn she has a body.
[NSFW] - Public pissing gone wrong.
[ SFW ] - Nice trucker hat.. and boobs.
[NSFW] - Nice ass and tits via webcam.
[NSFW] - I love skinny girls with fat asses.
[NSFW] - Real Defloration With A Lot Of Blood.
[ SFW ] - His GF may be the dumbest person ever.
[ SFW ] - Practice your putting on the potty! Haha
[NSFW] - Blonde wife does amateur porn on the side.
[ SFW ] - Very cool commercial (Not what you think)
[ SFW ] - Hey girls the fat kid from The Sandlot is single!
[ SFW ] - Campaign Ad urging people to pee in the shower.
[ SFW ] - Fat bitch in a wheelchair going through a drive-thru.
[ SFW ] - Mom accused of cutting off son's genitals blames dog.
[ SFW ] - What a nerd.. Guitar Hero + Rubik's Cube at the same time.
» Hello Ms Lady
posted on 08/10/09 by Opie
Fun Fact: Still finishing up the weekend site stuff, should be done today. Also not putting the W.O.W clip back up but I will have another Hanna clip Wednesday.
Silva Vs Griffin was the most ridiculous fight I've ever seen.
Drug Deal Gone Wrong. (Photo Shoot)
New rollin' video!
Inside tips from Ex Pedophile.
Apparently these deals are crazy.
He found a parking spot.
Best parallel parking job ever.
Reporter thinks 3 inch meat is funny. It is.
Dog that smoked weed.
Watch Vader get down.
Holy Squirt Batman!
Hey! Let's pop balloons on our vaginas!
A man approached a beautiful woman at a supermarket and said:
"I lost my wife in the supermarket. Can you talk to me for a while?"
She looks at him funny and asked. "So why should I talk to you?"
He answers:"Because whenever I talk to a woman with titties like yours my wife just pops out of nowhere"
- FFL -
[NSFW] - Find sex.
[NSFW] - Sexy babes.
[NSFW] - Her first orgy.
[ SFW ] - Got to love these.
[ SFW ] - Make a flower glow.
[ SFW ] - G.I. Joe skate stunt.
[NSFW] - She rides her first penis.
[ SFW ] - Oh my god and these tits.
[ SFW ] - Big Wheel of Fortune FAIL.
[ SFW ] - I want to go to Diggerland!
[ SFW ] - Monica Olsen + Bikini = Good.
[NSFW] - The best kind of porn. (FREE)
[ SFW ] - Proof Lady Gaga has a penis.
[ SFW ] - All these guys were innocent.
[ SFW ] - If you smell like shit, get this?
[NSFW] - Very nice rack in this sex tape.
[ SFW ] - Fight in the crowd at UFC 101.
[ SFW ] - 5 minutes of Iron Man 2 footage!
[ SFW ] - UFC 101 BJ Penn Vs Kenny Florian.
[ SFW ] - Mexico is building their own border!
[NSFW] - EX GF deep throating her college BF.
[ SFW ] - Hides gun in "flabs of fat" awesome.
[ SFW ] - The Astounding World of the Future!
[ SFW ] - The stupidest bid on The Price is Right.
[NSFW] - Girl on webcam and then her Mom joins.
[ SFW ] - All girls should have squirrels in their bras.
[ SFW ] - So this is like a pedophile's dream come true.
[NSFW] - Start watching at the 7:15 minute mark. Haha
[ SFW ] - Engage in a high speed pursuit on the highway.
[ SFW ] - So this is what Britney really sounds like on stage.
[ SFW ] - Haha, No wonder old black women hate the police.
[ SFW ] - Cool as fuck. Plane that goes to the edge of space.
[ SFW ] - Fake scent-tracking dog sends man to prison for 26 years.
[ SFW ] - OK guys here's a fag to make fun of. He's possibly a stalker too.
posted on 08/07/09 by Opie
Note: This weekend I'll finally have some free time, so keep eye out for updates and I also may put this weeks W.O.W clip back up for a little bit.
Horse jumps in a car.
Big ass water slide.
Those are in his nose.
Hey, you have a shovel in your head.
Steve and his buddies were hanging out and planning an upcoming fishing trip. Unfortunately, he had to tell them that he couldn't go this time because his wife wouldn't let him. After a lot of teasing and name calling, Steve headed home frustrated.
The following week when Steve's buddies arrived at the lake to set up camp, they were shocked to see Steve. He was already sitting at the campground with a cold beer, swag rolled out, fishing rod in hand, and a camp fire glowing.
"How did you talk your missus into letting you go Steve?"
"I didn't have to," Steve replied.
Yesterday, when I left work , I went home and slumped down in my chair with a beer to drown my sorrows because I couldn't go fishing. Then the ol' lady Snuck up behind me and covered my eyes and said, 'Surprise'."
"When I peeled her hands back, she was standing there in a beautiful see through negligee and she said, ' Carry me into the bedroom, tie me to the bed and you can do whatever you want'.....
So, Here I am!"
Vanessa Hudgens naked again.
PEDO BEAR GIF!
Send yours here
Crack makes you do funny things.
He would be ASIAN.
Best boobs ever.
Coyote was owned.
Looks like a match to me.
Classic image I found from a fan.
What is going on here?
Think they did that on purpose?
Oh that Obama.
I wouldn't go in either.
Who Doesn't Belong?
- FFL -
[NSFW] - Rough sex.
[ SFW ] - Racist dog!
[ SFW ] - Dog Snuggie.
[NSFW] - She gets naked.
[ SFW ] - Damn cock tease.
[NSFW] - The sexiest teens.
[NSFW] - FACEBOOK OF SEX!
[ SFW ] - How not to do a flip.
[ SFW ] - Best shirts I've seen.
[ SFW ] - This is very strange.
[ SFW ] - Kim Kardashian is hot.
[NSFW] - Best bikini bottom ever.
[NSFW] - Her body is near perfect.
[NSFW] - Hello girl with nice titties.
[NSFW] - Teens humping in the kitchen.
[NSFW] - Apparently this guy likes a Julie.
[ SFW ] - Sexy girls killing animals.. WTF?
[ SFW ] - Touchable Holograms. Pretty neat.
[ SFW ] - Andrew W.K. Weather Report.. Haha
[NSFW] - Having sex with a stump can be fun.
[ SFW ] - For all you guys that like dance offs.
[ SFW ] - Ultimate Staring Contest. Pretty good.
[ SFW ] - Anyone else want to go rape someone?
[ SFW ] - Build a bridge so your people can cross.
[ SFW ] - Ants create a lifeboat to save the queen.
[NSFW] - Teens Left Home Alone For Slumber Party.
[ SFW ] - Robocop fried chicken commercial. ASIANS!
[ SFW ] - Giants lock up Eli Manning with $97 million deal.
» spit on my wenis
posted on 08/05/09 by Opie
W.O.W (Yes, that's Hanna)
Tiger lets out a huge fart.
What exactly was he trying to do?
Always stay in your sit when riding the bus.
Anal Accident Of The Worst Kind
There was a little boy by the name of Billy. Billy was an ordinary little boy who did ordinary little boy things, like playing, eating, bathing, destroying things, and going to school. One day, when Billy went down to the bus stop to meet the bus to go to school, he found all of his friends huddled around in a little group, talking about the Purple Wombat.
Being a little boy, Billy was curious. So he asked them, "What's the Purple Wombat?"
"You don't know what the Purple Wombat is?" the children exclaimed disgustedly. For the rest of the morning, they would not go near Billy, always standing far away and staring at him. Then the bus came. Billy, confused, got on the bus along with the rest of the children.
"Hey, Mister Bus Driver!" one of the chldren shouted. "Billy doesn't know what the Purple Wombat is!"
The bus driver turned around abruptly. "You don't know what the Purple Wombat is?" he said in disbelief. He ordered Billy to sit in the very back of the bus, all by himself.
Eventually, they got to school, and Billy got off the bus and went to class. Class proceeded normally; the students did the pledge of allegiance and worked on their multiplication tables for a while. Then the teacher led them into a unit on geography. Billy was not really paying attention, but he heard the teacher mention something about the Purple Wombat.
Billy's hand shot up, and, when the teacher called on him, Billy asked, "Teacher, what's the Purple Wombat?"
"You don't know what the Purple Wombat is?" the teacher cried in alarm, "Get yourself to the principal's office right now, young man. No, no buts -- march!"
So Billy headed down the long, dark, frightening hallway to the principal's office. He slowly opened the large, heavy door, and timidly entered the room behind it. There, at a large, imposing desk, sat the principal. The principal was a hulking man, balding, with a thin mustache. He spoke in a deep baritone voice. He was enough to frighten little boys like Billy who had been sent to his office almost to tears.
"Well, Billy," he began slowly. "What seems to be the problem?"
"Mr. Principal, I just don't know what's going on today. Everyone's been acting weird, and they're all treating me really badly. Like teacher just sent me to you and stuff."
"Now, Billy, I'm here to help you. I'm the princi-Pal, after all. Heh heh. Can you tell me why everyone's acting so strangely?"
"It's because I don't know what some stupid Purple Wombat is."
"What? You don't know what the Purple Wombat is? That's it. I am calling your mother, young man. Consider yourself suspended."
The principal threw Billy out of his office and told him to go home. Billy, crying, began the long walk home. When he got there, his mother was standing in the doorway waiting for him.
"Billy!" she called, sobbing, "I was so worried about you! What happened?"
"Mom," Billy cried, "Everyone was being mean to me and I had to sit in the back of the bus all by myself and the teacher sent me to the principal's office and the principal suspended me, all because I don't know what the Purple Wombat is!"
"What? You don't know what the Purple Wombat is?" Billy's mother shrieked. "Go to your room this minute. Go! Just wait until your father gets home!"
So Billy marched up the stairs and into his room. He collapsed on the bed, crying. After some amount of time, he heard a car pull in and some doors shutting. His father was home. He could hear his parents talking downstairs but didn't know what they were saying. Then he heard footsteps coming up the stairs, and his door opened.
"Billy," his father began in that lecturing-father tone, "Your mother says you've been acting badly lately. Would you like to tell me what you've done?"
"Dad, I haven't done anything! I just don't know what the Purple Wombat is!"
"You...don't know what the Purple Wombat is. Well, in that case, you can just stay in this room all night, mister. And forget about dinner!"
Billy's father slammed the door and stormed off. Billy collapsed on his bed, crying his eyes out. He spent the next several hours that way -- lying there, crying, wishing he would wake up.
Then, in the middle of the night, he heard a voice. It said: "Billy. I am the Purple Wombat, Billy."
Billy sat up with a start. He looked around the room, trying to find the source of the voice, but he could not.
"Billy. I am the Purple Wombat. Find me, Billy."
It was coming from out the window. So Billy got up, put his shoes on, opened the window, and climbed out on to the roof.
"Billy. I am the Purple Wombat."
Billy jumped down off the roof and followed the voice down the road. He got to the edge of a wood.
"Billy. I am the Purple Wombat. Follow me, Billy."
The voice was coming from inside the wood. It was very dark and very frightening, but Billy didn't care. He had to find out what the Purple Wombat was. So, bravely, he entered the wood.
"Billy. I am the Purple Wombat. Keep going, Billy."
Billy kept going into the wood. He could hardly see anything, and he kept falling down and walking into things and hurting himself. But he kept going, driven by a need to find this enigma that kept calling his name.
"Billy. I am the Purple Wombat. This way, Billy."
Eventually, Billy emerged from the wood. He was on the shore of the town lake.
"Billy. I am the Purple Wombat. I'm out here, Billy."
It was coming from out across the lake. Billy got one of the small rowboats from the dock, untied it, and rowed out. Since he was only a small boy, it was very difficult. But he had to find out what the Purple Wombat was.
"Billy. I am the Purple Wombat. Row, Billy."
The voice was coming from across the lake. Billy doubled his effort, and the boat began to move a little faster. When he was about half way across the lake, he heard: "Billy, I am the Purple Wombat. I'm up here, Billy."
It was coming from directly above him. Billy stopped rowing and stood up to look for it. The boat tipped over, dumping him in the lake. Billy didn't know how to swim, so he drowned.
Moral: Don't stand up in a boat.
- FFL -
[NSFW] - Sluts.
[NSFW] - Find sex.
[NSFW] - Nice bikini.
[ SFW ] - Macgyver!
[NSFW] - Hot cam girls.
[ SFW ] - Cajun OnStar.
[ SFW ] - Giant water bomb.
[ SFW ] - Best of Jay Walking.
[ SFW ] - Move your boogie body!
[ SFW ] - Haha this dude is a faggot.
[ SFW ] - Tricks To Make Her Orgasm.
[ SFW ] - 30 shocking movie moments.
[ SFW ] - We need the unedited version.
[NSFW] - I think her tits may be perfect.
[ SFW ] - Give this man a pee pee towel.
[ SFW ] - She puts icing on that cake well.
[ SFW ] - Drive an ambulance in this game.
[ SFW ] - Thuggin It and Lovin It.. I want the DVD!
[NSFW] - Drunk College Bitch Fucked On Top Of A Sink In A Dorm.
» orange jews
posted on 08/03/09 by Opie
That's a kid she's dragging around.
Another new Billy Mays commercial.
Bet that hurt.
His arm goes pop.
Wait until you see who's driving.
A wife was making a breakfast of fried eggs for her husband.
Suddenly, her husband burst into the kitchen.
"Careful," he said, "CAREFUL! Put in some more butter! Oh my GOD!
You're cooking too many at once. TOO MANY! Turn them! TURN THEM NOW! We need more butter. Oh my GOD! WHERE are we going to get MORE BUTTER? They're going to STICK! Careful . CAREFUL! I said be CAREFUL! You NEVER listen to me when you're cooking! Never! Turn them! Hurry up! Are you CRAZY? Have you LOST your mind? Don't forget to salt them. You know you always forget to salt them. Use the salt. USE THE SALT! THE SALT!"
The wife stared at him. "What in the world is wrong with you? You think I don't know how to fry a couple of eggs?"
The husband calmly replied, "I just wanted to show you what it feels like when I'm driving."
- FFL -
[ SFW ] - Cartoon fail.
[NSFW] - Hot bitches.
[ SFW ] - Extreme 4x4.
[ SFW ] - 69 Etiquette.
[NSFW] - Big ass titties.
[ SFW ] - Come onnn tittie!
[ SFW ] - FACEBOOK OF SEX.
[ SFW ] - Ninja Assassin trailer.
[ SFW ] - Fastest text messager.
[ SFW ] - Pedo Yoga Farm.. WTF?
[ SFW ] - I want a vortex cannon!
[ SFW ] - Cool bike crash pictures.
[ SFW ] - A new WOW kid freakout.
[ SFW ] - How not to launch a boat.
[ SFW ] - The Hangover Baby Carlos.
[ SFW ] - Fun stuff to do with an iron.
[ SFW ] - Scare Tatics with Tracy Morgan!
[ SFW ] - A great place for whipped cream.
[NSFW] - Couple films themselves during sex.
[ SFW ] - D L Hughley crying like a little bitch.
[NSFW] - Little Virgin Was Too Scared To Say No.
[ SFW ] - Amazing lightning strike caught on camera,
[ SFW ] - Kill with us. Like from that movie Untraceable.
[NSFW] - This is one of the oldest adult cartoons ever made.
[ SFW ] - Seth Rogen Talks About Being Rejected by Megan Fox.