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� early for Friday bitches posted on 07/14/06 by Opie

Zebra trying to drown a lion.

Put a fake deer on a hood and...

This is funny as hell.

Fuck Chuck or fight Chuck?

Happy about his gift.

How ASIANS potty train.

Ryu and Duck Hunt.

Joke

A man absolutely hated his wife's cat and decided to get rid of him one day by driving him 20 blocks from his home and leaving him at the park.

As he was getting home, the cat was walking up the driveway.

The next day he decided to drive the cat 40 blocks away. He put the beast out and headed home.

Driving back up his driveway, there was the cat!

He kept taking the cat further and further and the cat would always beat him home. At last he decided to drive a few miles away, turn right, then left, past the bridge, then right again and another right until he reached what he thought was a safe distance from his home and left the cat there.

Hours later the man calls home to his wife: "Jen, is the cat there?"

"Yes," the wife answers, "why do you ask?"

Frustrated, the man answered, "Put that son of a bitch on the phone, I'm lost! and need directions!"

- FFL - (Short, but good)

- Bike Flip.
- Busty lesbian.
- Cool airshow.
- Donkey Kong bitch!
- This site is retarded.
- Marriage to a cow...
- Kung-Fu army training.
- The full Rocky 6 trailer.
- Cops and Robbers is fun.
- Thong and beercap game.
- Some funny shirts BE here.
- Land a dwarf on the boat.
- This is some nasty candy.
- Bush is a robot, funny stuff.
- Uh oh... some hot lesbians.
- A Pringles game, that isn't bad.
- Now this is a fight scene... haha
- Did you think she had 3 boobs too?

Post Archives

� ta daaa posted on 07/12/06 by Opie

W.O.W has a pretty face.

I added a lovely tune to this one.
Joke

A couple wants a divorce, but first they must decide who will be the main guardian of their child.
The jury asks both the man and woman for a reason why they should be the one to keep the child. So the jury asks the woman first.

She says, "Well I carried this child around in my stomach for nine months and I had to go through a painful birth process, this is my child and apart of me."

The jury is impressed and then turns to ask the man the same question.

The man replies, "OK, I take a coin and put it in the drink machine and a drink comes out, now tell me who does the drink belong to: me or the machine?"

Joke #2

The spark had been lost in this guy's marriage, so he was trying to think of a way to rekindle it.

One night he came from work, and found his wife asleep in bed.

He thought to himself, "what should I do?"

"Oh-I know."

He proceeded to get under the covers and go down on his wife. Soon she began to gently squirm and moan in pleasure.

After a few minutes, her body spasmed with ecstasy as she climaxed.

Afterwords, the man went straight to the bathroom to brush his teeth. When he got there, the light was on and he saw his wife there shaving her legs. He exclaimed, "What are you doing in here?!?"

She said, "Shhhh!," pointing at the bed, "You'll wake your mother..."

- FFL -

- Paper SUV.
- Great catch.
- Hot blondes.
- Alien fisting?
- Pissed plants.
- Russian chick.
- Dirty mind ads.
- Homemade porn.
- Worst driver ever.
- Horny hotel guest.
- Cool stickman game.
- George Foreman's crib
- Someone is a Mario fan.
- Niggas will eat anything.
- A lot of fat ass in America.
- Hello. I'm a fucking faggot.
- Get laid on Myspace? Nah.
- A game that may piss you off.
- Blind Date uncensored part 1.
- Whos Line Is It Anyways clip.
- Not sure what the hell this is...
- Roommate Dance Dance Revolution.
- Stern, naked girl, and she's on a bed.
- A bunch of webcam girls on youtube.
- Sex party that needs grammar/spelling police.
- Only scientist in England would think this shit up.
- Time machine for sale. Don't forget the crystals..

Post Archives

� English peas. posted on 07/10/06 by Opie

Got Internet at my new house and the archives are up. Expect some good stuff coming soon.

Juggernaut part 2!

Hello, I'm dumb.

My own little background music.

He saw itself.

Fear of birds and mustard. (Seems fake to me)
Learn Chinese in 5 minutes

English - Chinese (Read them outloud)

Are you harboring a fugitive- Hu Yu Hai Ding

See me A.S.A.P. - Kum Hia Nao

Small Horse - Tai Ni Po Ni

Your price is too high - No Bai Dam Thing

Did you go to the beach - Wai Yu So Tan

I bumped into a coffee table - Ai Bang Mai Ni

I think you need a facelift - Chin Tu Fat

It's very dark in here - Wai So Dim?

Has your flight been delayed? - Hao Long Wei Ting?

That was an unauthorized execution.- Lin Ching

I thought you were on a diet - Wai Yu Mun Ching?

This is a tow away zone. - No Pah King

You are not very bright - Yu So Dum

I got this for free - Ai No Pei

I am not guilty - Wai Hang Mi?

Please, stay a while longer - Wai Go Nao?

Our meeting was scheduled for next week - Wai Yu Kum Nao

They have arrived - Hia Dei Kum

Stay out of sight - Lei Lo

He's cleaning his automobile - Wa Shing Ka

Does this bathroom stink! Hu Flung Dung?

- FFL -

- The Alien.
- Big tittie alert.
- She's too hot.
- Dane Cook clip.
- Birth Barbie doll.
- Dogs are lucky.
- This is not gay.
- Girls Gone WILD.
- Oprah Beatdown.
- Kate's bubble bath
- Big gay Goth dude.
- CRAZY ASIAN orgy.
- My dirty little secret.
- Ohhh, just some sex.
- Rocky 6 is going to rule.
- I need me a Goth chick.
- Truth about Scientology.
- Watch out for white people.
- Sex act quiz... I got a 58%.
- Another use for a bean bag.
- Pam Anderson is always hot.
- Blonde with the perfect Legs
- Anyone think Liv Tyler is hot?
- This is odd, but has big titties.
- Tito Ortiz Vs. Ken Shamrock 2.
- Another Incredible Hulk movie...
- Natalie Portman is going nude.
- Only reason to see "The Break-up".
- Cheating with a punk midget... haha.
- Geek Squad badge on eBay... Stupid.
- Wouldn't be racist if it was the other way around.
- David "The Hoff" Hasselhoff has an awesome new song... haha

Post Archives

� Early W.O.W - hooray posted on 07/05/06 by Opie

W.O.W (No more ad page, due to installer shit - they are fuckers)

And a funny porn clip.
Joke

So Bob has a speech impediment. He needs a few things so he goes shopping.

First he goes to a gas station and asks the clerk "Can I get some bum?". The clerk looks confused and the Bob points to some gum.

So he walks out with his gum and goes to the hardware store. Bob says "Do you have a fuckit?" Again the clerk looks at him strangely, but he points to a bucket.

So Bob walks out with his gum and his bucket and goes to the pet store.

He says to the clerk "I was wondering if you had any cock-and-spank-its?" The clerk is beside himself and gasps until Bob points to a dog that is called a cockerspaniel.

So Bob walks out with his gum, his bucket, and his dog. All of a sudden the leash breaks and the dog goes running off.

So Bob runs up to a man and says, "Quick, hold my bum and fuckit while I grab my cock and spank it!"

- FFL -

- Rough porn.
- Sexist T-shirts.
- Hot waitresses.
- KO and robbed.
- Amiee Rickards.
- I heart lesbians.
- Shag-Marry-Kill.
- A shirt for rapist.
- Plants play dead?
- Battleships bitch.
- Potato Gun shot.
- 3.3 million fireworks.
- Meet a black person.
- Queen Wag on date?
- "Amateur" sex video.
- Firecracker accident?
- I used to watch 90210.
- Ohhh an Italian couple.
- Hot beach blonde chick.
- $100 burger. Fuck that.
- Devil gets his ass kicked.
- The answer to this is No.
- Jessica Alba gets banged.
- A white dude over 7 feet tall.
- Play a phone trick on your friends.
- 8 year old heroin OD. Yes, it's a video.

Notes: I may have time to post late Friday, since Cox is coming then, if not Monday will be a good one.

Thanks for be patient.

Post Archives

� Firecracker time. posted on 07/03/06 by Opie

He's lucky.

Ouch.

Damn you overachiever...

Watch out.

Old school porn is funny.

In your dreams.
Submit more jokes bitches

THINGS THAT ARE DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN YOU'RE DRUNK:
Indubitably
Innovative
Preliminary
Proliferation
Cinnamon

THINGS THAT ARE VERY DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN YOU'RE DRUNK:
Specificity
British Constitution
Passive-aggressive disorder
Loquacious Transubstantiate

THINGS THAT ARE DOWNRIGHT IMPOSSIBLE TO SAY WHEN YOU'RE DRUNK:
Thanks, but I don't want to have sex
Nope, no more booze for me
Sorry, but you're not really my type
Good evening officer, isn't it lovely out tonight
Oh, I just couldn't. No one wants to hear me sing.

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